Personal Blog

  • What to do if you can’t seem to lose fat.

    Have you tried to lose weight but can't seem to succeed no matter how hard you try?

    Do you feel like you’ve “tried everything” but you can’t lose weight? Do you wonder if you are cursed? Do you feel like no matter how hard you exercise and eat right you just stay the same- or worse yet, you are GAINING WEIGHT?

    You aren’t alone. And I can relate to your feelings more than you know. Read on to learn how to REALLY start making headway on your fitness goals, even if you feel stuck AF. 

    That’s funny. Stuck AF. It rhymes. 😉

    Things to consider when you aren't losing weight.

    • Hormones. Once you are past the age of 25, you need to get comprehensive bloodwork done. Period. And you need to get it done regularly. And you must see a qualified doctor who practices integrative medicine ideally– who can translate your results for you. Hormones affect EVERYTHING. Good thing is- hormonal balance is achievable– although it does take time. Trust me on this. I’ll have a LOT of posts coming up on this here in the near future so be sure you are subscribed my friends. 
    • Stress. This is tied to hormones as well- because stress affects cortisol which affects fat storage– but the more stressed out you are, the harder it will be to lose fat. 
    • Sleep. If you are not sleeping, your body will revolt against you. You need sleep and good quality sleep. 
    • Exercise and Diet. DUH!! But- not too much and not too little. Overtraining and Undereating are a recipe for disaster just like overeating and under-exercising. You gotta find that happy place in between. Hard to do in this fad diet focused country we live in….I know! 
    •  All of these topics above I will cover here in more depth — each in its own blog post and I’ll also point you to several podcasts I recorded with experts on these topics. So stay tuned for that. 

    The Other Biggest Factor In You Not Losing FAT Is- YOU.

    Ok so here is the biggest downer part of this post but for so many of you- (and this includes ME too) ladies, this is one of the biggest factors preventing you from losing fat. 

    It’s you. Yes, it’s YOU. If you are like me, you get to this point where you can see how far you’ve come but you also see what STILL ISN’T CONQUERED. You see that belly fat shaking its fist at you daring you to try to get rid of it. You see that while you feel good in a lot of your clothes, you still have a lot of jeans and dresses and shorts in your closet that are too tight. 

    Been here? More than once? I hear you. I have been too. I’m so tired of looking back and analyzing the good months of this year or that year and trying to figure out what was I doing then that was working vs. now…..and the thing is….I spend and have spent a lot of time looking back instead of looking HERE. Looking at myself right now. This week, this month. Right now. What am I doing or not doing and how long have I been not doing it?

    Ladies, if you can be real with yourself, even though you’ve probably said out loud – to yourself or to others – “I’ve tried EVERYTHING!! NOTHING WORKS!! I MUST JUST BE CURSED TO BE OVERWEIGHT!”– you are wrong. None of us are cursed. All of us have the potential to fix our health issues, including losing fat. 

    While all of the above topics I shared in the bullet points earlier in this post are a factor in our ability to lose fat and get lean….we are still more often self-sabotaging our efforts more than we realize. 

    If you are like me, you get to a certain place where you’ve lost fat/weight and you are feeling GOOD– you love that you can wear clothes you couldn’t a while back and it’s like this huge sigh of relief…so…you get comfortable. You get a little too comfortable and a little too cocky– unintentionally, mind you. No one says to themselves “I just made some great progress I’m going to get lazy and sabotage my efforts so I stay stuck in this plateau and frustrated AF all the time”.

    NO ONE says that. 

    But here is the hard truth that I think a LOT of us forget. Because it isn’t talked about a lot. Getting fit and staying in your best shape possible is NOT easy– especially after the age of 25 or so. There are lifestyle and hormonal things working against you. Getting fit and staying fit are WORK. Like- a solid amount of work and effort and focus and staying on point. For a whole lot of us we have to be super diligent. Unless you are a superstar athlete who trains so hard you have to eat like a billion calories just to not lose weight (dreamy right?) — you and I have to WATCH WHAT WE EAT– what we eat and how much we eat. And it’s highly likely if we are tracking our foods, we can easily OVEREAT — and eat too many carbs and not enough protein- or, not eat enough in the midst of a schedule where we are working out regularly– not eating enough is just as bad for fat loss as eating too much crap food. It’s very very true. 

    The Juice Is Worth The Squeeze.

    Ladies, we each have to decide what is most important to us. And if you are like me, and being in your most optimal health is beyond appealing to you, then you have to embrace the notion that it requires WORK and attention to detail – a lot of it. I’m realizing with utter clarity that I have been my biggest obstacle. I get too comfortable too soon and then I think I’m eating on point but I’m really not- I’m eating 90% what most would say are healthy foods: salads, organic/grass fed meats, healthy fats, fruits and vegetables, protein shakes etc. – are you reading this and thinking I’m crazy– how could I not be at 20% body fat or 15% body fat eating that kind of food every day? 

    People- you can gain weight or prevent weight/fat loss by eating all healthy foods. Too many calories are too many calories. When your intake is too many carbs and not enough proteins/fats, you are spiking insulin and encouraging fat storage. 

    I have been far too laxe in my efforts. I don’t have a body that allows me to just wing it. I’ve gotten in great shape- after GAINING weight last year following some poor nutrition advice and not trusting my gut (that’s another blog post coming up too y’all…..big lesson there)- but to be real, I am easily still 10-15lbs over my ideal weight. Easily. And I am just kind of STAYING HERE. 

    And I realized this past week how laxe I had been about tracking food– and how I have not been good about protein and then I’ve been allowing myself alcohol on the weekends with my man. THIS all adds up to my body staying put. 

    I’m SO DAMN TIRED of not being to react to a “Hey honey let’s go to Miami next month” suggestion with a “hell yea let me go buy a new hot bikini” (and instead immediately panic and think about what fad diet I can hop on to lose 10lbs because I feel mushy). I’m tired of always being CLOSE to fit. I’m tired of always striving and wanting to be my best self, physically- and yet I have never really gotten there where I am comfortable and confident in my own skin. 

    All of this– the fact that I’ve not been nearly focused and diligent enough on my health goals and that I’ve done this for YEARS– putting myself last, self-sabotaging for whatever reason and then feeling hideous about how I look inside…..all of this hit me like a ton of bricks recently. I realized life is too short, here I am in love with the absolute love of my life and looking forward to traveling the world together– and yet, I’ve held myself back from running the last 5 miles of the marathon, figuratively speaking. 

    That’s how my fitness journey feels- as if I have signed up for many marathons but in all of them I stopped at mile 20 then trained for another one then stopped at mile 21 then started all over….

    I’m ready to get to mile 26.2. I’m ready to HIT THE TARGET instead of always talking about it as if it’s not achievable. It IS.  I am capable, I have to just get out of my own way. 

    Ladies, the devil is in the details. If you really want to get in the best shape ever you have to give it your ALL. You gotta track your meals and your macros and honor your committments to yourself EVERY DAY. You have to figure out what YOU need to do –whether it’s limiting alcohol to the weekends or one night or adding in more workouts or some HIIT cardio or tracking your food in a notebook or MyFitnessPal. Do the extra work, the extra steps. 

    What is the better feeling: going in to your closet and being able to pick out anything? Or feeling like you want to crumble and cry because you still can’t fit in your jeans? It sucks to feel shitty about your body. It SUCKS. It feels sooooo awesome to feel great about how you look- why do we allow ourselves to focus on the wrong things? 

    Sure, cake is yummy and donuts are divine but I’m willing to forgo many MOMENTS of taste pleasure for a lifetime of feeling free and confident and awesome about myself. 

    I hope this wake up call helped you as it’s helped me. I’m in this to win it now. No more months of almost there. No more years of “well crap I’m still not at my goals”. I’m moving on UP!.

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  • How to get INSANELY beautiful skin at any age.

    Great skin requires a solid skincare routine.

    Ladies, how many of you love your skin? How many of you wonder how to get better skin? How many of you wonder what anti-aging products are the BEST and actually WORK? How many of you are interested in how to get great looking skin after the age of 40 or 50 or 60? How many of you have experienced your skin and face showing the signs of aging after having kids or experiencing hormonal imbalance- or both? 

    I hear you.

    I haven’t had kids, but I’ve had massive hormonal imbalance issues for YEARS– and about a year and a half ago, I noticed my face wasn’t making me happy when I looked in the mirror. 

    The truth is, for most of my adult life, even though I’ve baked in the sun for hours on end and gone to tanning beds and not worn SPF….I’ve never felt gross about my skin. I’ve never had that thing happen that people warned me about- “Oh if you keep going out in the sun you’ll look like you’re 70 when you are 30…”. 

    NEWSFLASH: I’m 50 now and look better than I ever have- and I have never been mistaken for looking OLDER but rather for looking younger than my age. 

    Still. After 2 of the most stressful years of my life and after some weight gain and weight loss- my face looked WORN and my skin looks bland. Dull. Not happy. 

    Sometimes aging hits you like a ton of bricks. In the face. At close range.

    It was not a happy time when I first started realizing I was seeing AGING. I’d noticed some laxity in my facial skin for several years- in my YouTube videos- and had always planned to get “some work done” but I’d always felt good about myself even with no makeup (half of my YouTube videos in the past were sans makeup after a workout) and never felt like I looked OLD. 

    Then there came those days when I suddenly saw myself in the mirror and I just thought I looked pale and drawn and my skin looked dull and lifeless. Seriously. It reminded me of how my man describes the weather in Chicago; BLEAK.

    SO- even though I had been using some skincare products for years (Arbonne) I decided to level up and get Botox. I made my appointment and – oh boy did I feel revived after getting Botox. Seriously. Injectables and me are now BFFs. But this is when I learned about GLOWBIOTICS- medical grade skincare. I bought a package of several of their best selling products and have been hooked ever since. The truth is I saw my skin improve so much after using it day and night that I stalked them online and got a meeting with the marketing team because I wanted to help them spread the word. And I did and the team at GLOWBIOTICS is an awesome one. Their probiotic-based skincare line is to-die-for! It’s a big part of why I feel so amazing about how I look at age 50!! I’m looking forward to 60 and 70 and beyond! For real. 

    Great skin takes time and effort and money but it's so WORTH IT.

    So- here are my tips based on my experience for how to get great skin at any age.

    • First of all, recognize this does require some time. You gotta wash your face- wash your makeup off at night. So many women don’t do this and OY TO THE VEY come on!! Invest in 5-10 minutes each morning and night for your skincare routine. You’ll notice the results.

    Invest in a Clarisonic device. Seriously. This is exfoliation at its best. Go to YouTube and watch every beauty vlogger recommend it too. JUST BUY it and use it to wash your face and neck and chest every night: CLICK HERE to buy on Amazon.com. 

    • Get an “anti-aging pillowcase”. If you would have asked me years ago if I’d fall for this concept I would have laughed but– after I started getting waxed and got my FACE – full face waxed and ended up with breakouts on my chin/neck- my wax lady explained that because I did not listen to her and change my pillowcase, my open pores that day that slept on a not-clean pillowcase got clogged with dirt and bacteria. GULP. I then began looking up anti-aging/healthy skin pillowcases. Get you some. CLICK HERE to buy. 
    • DUH. Stock up on the best skincare on the planet- At GLOWBIOTICS.COM.  Use code KELLY20 to get 20% off all regularly priced items at their website. 
    • Get enough sleep. If you aren’t sleeping well or long enough (8 hours) – you will look haggard and nasty. Get sleep. I love my Sleep Number bed and my man and I thrive and sleep well with that plus COMPHY sheets and room darkening curtains. 
    • Don’t eat crap. What you eat affects your skin.
    • De-stress. Invest in self-care in a big way. Stress will destroy your health and make you look 25 years older. Anti-age from within by de-stressing. 
    • Don’t SMOKE. If you are a smoker I don’t know what to tell you other than you are dumb AF. Stop it. 
    • Watch alcohol intake. 
    • Hydrate hydrate hydrate. 

    You can start improving your skin and your looks at ANY AGE.

    I want to reiterate the notion that you can start getting great skin at any age. I didn’t start til age 37 with any skincare and didn’t get Botox until age 48! I personally feel that the non-invasive cosmetic procedures out there today combined with amazing medical grade skincare like GLOWBIOTICS plus= applying all that we know about health and wellness and stress etc. and- great contouring (YASSS QUEENS) it’s a fabulous time to be a woman– why fear aging? Embrace it by diving into all the options. Why the heck wouldn’t you?

    My review of my favorite GLOWBIOTICS products for amazing skin.

    Some of my favorite products by GLOWBIOTICS-- get you some!!

    As mentioned in my review — these are my favorite products that I use regularly by GLOWBIOTICS:

    Ladies, use my code: KELLY20 to get 20% off at GLOWBIOTICS.COM. I promise, you will be obsessed!!

    What questions do you have about anti-aging, or skincare specifically? Let me know in the comments below and be sure you are subscribed– I’ve got lots more surprises coming up soon- I’M BACK!! 😉 

     

    Disclosure: This post contains several affiliate links. I also am a part of the GLOWBIOTICS Skinfluencer program and am provided products in exchange for my transparent reviews and recommendations online. I originally started off as a customer of theirs and now am a partner because I love their products so much. 

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  • Why you have to start being more SELFISH.

    Why women need to start being more selfish.

    When you bring up the word “selfish” to a woman, she’s typically going to cringe. It’s a word we often think of strictly in the negative sense, and it’s time to re-evaluate that whole situation. Yes, I meant to type that. Ladies, it’s time to stop thinking that being SELFISH is a bad thing.

    I’ve learned a whole lot of life lessons in the past several years, many of which you’ll hear about here on my newly re-launched blog (be sure you are subscribed– do so over at the sidebar right now y’all!) – and one of them is that women, myself included, can often be such people pleasers by nature, they will put everyone else’s needs before their own, all the time. While this sounds nice and potentially noble, don’t kid yourself. It’s not. It’s more like a recipe for disaster. And burnout. And adrenal fatigue, among other things. 

     

    Being unselfish is a recipe for disaster.

    What do I mean really, when I say that being unselfish is a recipe for DISASTER? Seriously. Well, if you are, like I have been for most of my adult life, a people pleaser who thrives by taking care of EVERYONE else around you- your significant other, your family, your friends, your neighbors, your co-workers or employees, if you don’t pay attention, you may not notice that YOUR life is suffering. YOUR productivity at work is on the decline because you are carrying everyone else’s burdens. Your emotional state of mind can be one of sheer turmoil and exhaustion because you are shouldering the burden of trying to solve everyone else’s problems. (Have you done this? Someone you know loses a job and you feel it’s YOUR job to help them find a new one. It’s YOUR problem they can’t pay their bills. It’s YOU who should lend them money and YOU who should network for them to get a new job…..yea, I’ve been there!!) When you are relentlessly unselfish all the time, you say YES to every request- from co-workers or your boss, or your employees even! You say yes to every social request, even the ones you don’t want to to attend, because God forbid you say NO. What does this do? It leaves you with a schedule that is impossible to maintain, yet you keep trying. When you are insanely unselfish at home, you run around the second you get home taking care of everyone else’s needs- cleaning the house, doing the laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning up the kitchen etc. — and you don’t pay attention to the fact that you are EXHAUSTED. 

    And then you look around and wonder why you don’t have the energy to work out. And you wonder even if you DID have the energy, when would you find the TIME? Yea– read above- remember– your schedule is impossibly full. So you have no time. 

    This is a road to nowhere. Because it never ends. The people you think you are helping or serving will not typically appreciate it, but they will come to EXPECT IT. And so their dependency on you will never stop. Their demands will only increase because you’ve set the tone for your relationship — you have become the GO-TO-GIRL. For everything.

    Why you need a LIFE wake-up call.

    Ladies, I’ve had quite a lot of LIFE wake-up calls in the past couple of years- and I’m so grateful for them. I’m convinced that too many of us are walking around on auto-pilot every day, not considering if where we are- with our work, with our body, with our health, with our relationships, is where we want to be. We just keep trudging through the days hoping to “get by” or thinking that things will inevitably get better if we keep working hard, working long, being caring and giving and unselfish etc. It doesn’t work that way. If our lives are to change for the better, it’s up to US to change them. And we can’t change them if we aren’t paying attention. We really REALLY need to start paying attention to ourselves. 

    It’s when we start paying attention to ourselves, and making that a .habit, that we can improve the overall quality of our LIFE. And when we do that, TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THIS– IT’S NOT JUST AN OPRAH-SHOW CLICHE– when you are happier and more fulfilled and healthy and loving life, you WILL do more for the others in your life. 

    You’ll perform better at the office. You’ll be a better wife/girlfriend/mom/best friend/co-worker. 

    I shot an impromptu video on this topic the end of last week– watch below and let me know if this resonates with you. 

    Ladies, are you feeling this? Is this you? It was me for years. I have ignored my goals and my health issues and my visions for too long. Now, I’m learning, my life and my health will only change and improve to the degree that I invest time and focus and activity on them. HELLO!! It’s time to look inward and focus on US, so we can be better inevitably for those around us. Do you agree? Let me know in the comments what questions you have and if this struck a chord with you. I’ll see you soon. The first half of this year was a lot of prep work for what I’m finally going live with the second half of this year so make sure you are subscribed!! 😉 

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